how can u be prego again
"it" just moved
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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