remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
