we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Randomize
