and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
He is an equal opportunity slut.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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