Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Randomize
