thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
