id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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