before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
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