I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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