White coat. Heels.
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
