After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I am spending my child support on dildos
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Randomize
