Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
