I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
My underwear smells like fireworks.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Randomize
