he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
