It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
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