i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
