No, you can still breathe under the balls.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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