Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
