On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Randomize
