Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
