he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Randomize
