What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
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He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
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Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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