Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
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