You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
