can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
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