He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
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