To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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