He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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