He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Randomize