It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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