Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
