You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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