what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Randomize
