he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Randomize