Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
My liver just had a heart attack.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
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