If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Randomize
