Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Randomize
