STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize
