I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
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