Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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