Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
