Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
