Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize
