Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
