My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
