We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
