If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize
