Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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