I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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