you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I am midnight drunk by noon
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
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