Please, let me fuck your mom
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
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