Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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